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The UPS and DOWNS of TEENAGERS

Having a teenager can be difficult for all parties concerned, including the teenager them self. While parents are extremely busy these days in just keeping up with ever day living, teenagers can be especially mood.
It is so important, however, to remember that although the teenager is starting to act like an adult – wanting to do adult things – they are still children. They do get to a point where they are responsible for their own behavior, but it can be difficult to pin point the exact age. All kids are different, and you can usually tell by their behavior whether they are mature enough to make certain decisions.
One example could be at what age they should be driving. The state has a certain age, however, you should be able to tell if they are mature enough to be driving at the age 16 or 18 (or even longer). It is important for them to get their permit and learn how to be well experienced, but if they need to practice for another year or two, then by all means, wait!
I realize that people will disagree with the above statements, but there are too many irresponsible teenagers out there driving and getting into accidents that kill others or themselves. It’s a terrible thought, but it is a reality.
Teenagers need to be taught respect. You should give them a certain amount of respect, and perhaps some breathing room if needed, meaning don’t suffocate them with yourself or their siblings. Just make sure they know they know who to respect. It is up to you as a parent to let them know (or remind them), that they still live under your roof and they are to respect your rules. An example of this might be letting them know to come directly home from school and go straight to homework or take a small break after school and then start on homework. You have to lay down some ground rules on several things.
Make sure that they have a list of duties that applies to their age. Jr. high and high school is sometimes loaded down with homework so you might want to make their list of chores conform with their homework. An example would be if they normally do the dishes, sweep and take out the trash but have a final in biology then, of course, the biology exam is a little more important. You could maybe just have them take out the trash that day.

Another way around this is, if they have siblings, they could trade off on chores according to homework needs. It is important for them to have a good idea of what responsibility is at home. School is their job for the most part, now, but there will always be responsibilities at home, no matter how old they get (as we all know).
At times teenagers may seem have a roller coaster personality (this is generally normal), for example, they might be perfectly calm one minute, and the next minute they are in an uproar over something. You should be aware if there are any huge changes in appetite and all over well being. Also, pay attention to if they lose interest in things. Depression is climbing the ladder in teens, and it is important to always monitor their behavior.
About the only way you can monitor their behavior is by keeping calm yourself. It’s hard to watch someone else if you are always in an uproar about things yourself. In fact, sometimes this can make things worse for a teenager who is already stressed or possibly depressed.
A little stress is normal and having a down day is normal too but, make sure to keep open the lines of communication always. We see more and more commercials these days on how we need to talk to our children about everything from smoking and drinking to sex. Talk to your kids even if you think they don’t want to.

If there is ever a situation where you hear from your child’s friend or friends that they’ve talked about suicide, then this needs immediate attention. Keep in mind that teenagers tend to be impulsive and it’s urgent that you see about getting them help. This is intended to show you that it is important enough that the parents need to be aware. Kids have problems too.

Also, parents get really busy at pointing out the wrongs of their teenagers, yet often overlook into their minds to see where they might be wrong. Sometimes parents are in the wrong too, and there are times that a parents need to realize when they are in the wrong themselves, and be sure to let your teens know it. This way you are teaching them how to be more responsible for their actions. They will learn from you that everyone is in the wrong at times, and we all should apologize.

Adults should also consider if they themselves have done any wrong in this problem or problems, especially ongoing ones. Parents can actually be to blame for many situations, just by the example they are setting.

Yelling is something that can trigger rebellious acts within a teenagers life. When you yell it means you’ve lost control. If you don’t want your teenager to lose control then you cannot either. In fact, you must not display any type of wrongdoings, such as yelling, hitting, cursing, degrading, or any acts of disrespect if you don’t want your teenager doing the same thing.

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